gagglefrak - comic books, science fiction, faux profanity

“Seriously, whose guy is the T-Rex? Who brings a T-Rex to a vamp battle?” - Loan Shark Demon Lord

Angel’s big day has arrived. The showdown with the Demon Lords. We learn that he has to shave and cut his own hair to keep people from figuring out that he’s not a vampire any more. And we learn that the glamour that creates the illusion he’s a vampire is somewhere inside of him. “Best not to ask.”

He jumps on his pet dragon and heads to the show. On the way, he saves human who’s been tossed into the crowd by a demon. Then he gives a really bad, very uninspiring speech. Then the champions start kicking his ass … or trying to. There’s a T-Rex, and a She-Skip, and a Human Torch, and a Shadow Thing. Please stop me if these descriptions are too technical for you. Continue Reading »

“Hell has been kind to you, old friend! And Wesley! I heard you’re without mass! Good for you, always keep your enemies guessing!” - Groosalugg to Wesley

Issue #4 of “After the Fall” starts with a very short flashback of the series finale battle that clearly has Angel a bit confused. Perhaps he’s still suffering residual Illyria time jump effect? Anyway, in the present, he forgets he’s not a vampire, and jumps off a building to save some humans from a zombie, and breaks his legs in the process. Wesley takes him back to the office for some voodoo healing, while Angel reads something that looks like the Necronomicon from the Evil Dead movies. We learn that for months, Wesley has been healing his wounds and casting glamors to make everybody in Hell perceive him to still be a vampire. Angel believes that making him human was Wolfram & Hart’s way of defeating him — taking away his power when he needs it most — and that keeping up the illusion is the only way to beat them.

A pair of colorful females arrive, and escort the two of them to Silver Lake, a happy haven of sorts, lorded over by none other than the Jolly Green Demon himself, Lorne, who is much loved in this little corner of Hell. Meanwhile, back at Bikini Central, Spike has received less attractive visitors — demon henchmen who have come to give Illyria an artifact called a Hagun Shaft, which each of the lords possess, and which is to be used to kill Angel painfully in the event that he manages to defeat all of their champions. Illyria herself hears none of this, however, because she’s busy gnashing her teeth while locked inside a vault. Not sure why. Continue Reading »

“Oh, hi Buffy. Hi nude Asian girl.” - Andrew to Buffy/Satsu

Let’s cut to the chase, shall we? Four pages into “Wolves at the Gate, Part 1,” (a.k.a. Issue #12) we find Buffy in bed in with Satsu, both of them naked. And yes, it’s exactly what it looks like. Buffy has entered Willow territory. Which in this case makes her the WORST BOSS EVER. Especially since she spent all of the previous issue insisting to Satsu that she should NOT be in love with her, and that such feelings could only end badly. But if we’ve learned anything about Buffy over the years, it’s that she fully embraces her role as a master of mixed messages and the queen of failing to consider how her actions might adversely affect others, emotionally or physically.

Having said that, it certainly made for a most shocking splash page, no? And in true Whedon fashion, a hilarious turn of events as well. No sooner does Buffy finish telling Satsu that she should exercise discretion, Xander bursts into the room, then his new squeeze (slayerette Renee), then a groggy Andrew. Then Dawn peeks in through the window. Then Willow crashes through the ceiling, finally offering Buffy a needed diversion … Continue Reading »

Okay, so just for the record? What we saw last night was not really a “two-hour finale” for The Sarah Connor Chronicles. It was the next-to-last episode and the season finale, played back to back. I’m just saying. I enjoyed both episodes very much — more on that in a moment — but I wish networks would stop playing this particular marketing trick. Because some shows actually do go out of their way to create finale episodes that sustain and cohere over two hours, and that’s not what this was. There’s a way to advertise things like this without being deceptive.

Rant over. On with the nice words now …

In “Vick’s Chip”, we do NOT find out that Skynet’s grandfather is the Commodore VIC-20, if that’s what you were thinking. Because we all know that Turk is the illegitimate love child of an Apple IIe and a TRS-80 (Model III). No matter what that tramp Amiga 500 says. Continue Reading »